Why can't I just take a compliment?
It's something that I'm working on. A very special person told me recently that I need to learn to love me for me and all the things that I offer to people. I talked to Tom a long time about this tonight. The problem is, I have a hard time seeing it. Besides struggling with the whole inner and outer beauty thing, I don't think the life I live is that special - I do what I do because I enjoy it... be it working, volunteering, exercising, cooking, laughing, shopping, sleeping, etc. Yes, I generally do good things. I live by the rule of "treat people as you would want to be treated". I am loyal and honest and hard working. I take risks, I love with all my heart, I'm not a quitter.
Do you struggle with this? Do you take compliments well? Do you love yourself for who you are and what you have to offer? Just some food for thought...
And the next time someone tells me something good about me, I'm going to work on just saying "thank you". Heck, I might even agree with them and say "Thank you, I am pretty awesome".
26 comments:
I love that. I think we all have trouble taking compliments, but "thank you, I am awesome" rocks as a response!
I completely get this! Most of my remarks to compliments are self-deprecating. This is a good reminder to just say thank you, even when it feels uncomfortable to do so. And, BTW- I think you're pretty awesome! :)
Oh I am THE worst. My husband tells me all the time. I do the rolling of the eyes, I change the subject...
I am very good at taking compliments on my KIDS though!!!
You Rock! ...and you're welcome! I totally get this as well. It's so easy to just brush compliments and accolades off or just not see it. But, I think it's healthy to hear what other people are seeing too. Take the compliments...you deserve it.
Geez, I am not really sure. I don't think anyone ever compliments me on anything. :)
Have a good one Colleen. :)
Ugh, I am horrible at this, too. I swear I roll my eyes at least once a day from something my husband says.
You ARE awesome!!!
It is actually a skill that has to be learned. In the deep south we only want to give and are taught to feel guilty about receiving. Doing or saying something nice for other people instantly makes us uncomfortable when someone else does or says something nice about us.
Case in point: once I gave a friend of mine about $300 in gift cards when I was getting out of this one program and couldn't use them anymore. Then about 5 years later I had completely forgotten about it when I ran into this guy again and he gave me back some of the same program money - enough to get lunch at this bbq place for me and the wife. I felt guilty accepting it. But he felt pride in being able to repay something he considered a debt even though I didn't expect it.
You remember back in high school when social norms were still forming? I know there were tons of girls that I thought were way to pretty and just totally out of my league. Turns out, some of those same girls thought I was totally out of their league. Everybody has the same hangups about self-worth and it's very difficult to accept.
I get embarrassed when I get a compliment. I usually answer with an "Oh, thanks" then I blush and change the subject : )
you and i have had this conversation before friend, and we are two peas in a pod. i am trying to learn to say "thank you" instead of making a joke or passing it off as a joke. love you friend!
I feel the same way...never know how to respond to a compliment. Saying "thank you" seems so simple, so why is it so hard to do?!!?!?!?!
I think it's hard for those of us that don't want to sound like conceited biotches :).
Yes, you are awesome!
That may or may not have sounded slightly Richard Simmons-esque.
I don't take compliments well at all. Whenever Ben compliments me, I always say, "You're only saying that because you're my husband and you're supposed to."
I struggle with this all the time!
thank you.
thank you.
thank you.
freaking love this post.
Why can't I just take a compliment?
I'll amen to that.
I was raised to be humble almost toooooooooooooo humble. too much. I do not accept compliments well.
To you I say - you freaking rock.
You say back - Why thank you, Emz, I know. :)
You may or may not remember this but years ago Terrell Owens had a quote that has stuck with me and something I love.
He said: I Love Me, Some Me
Now he was being obnoxious but for me it was so true. If I don't love myself how will anybody else love me? I take care of myself so that I can take care of others.
I don't get jealous of others and don't compare myself to them either because this is my life and not theirs. That is their life and not mine.
Love You, Some You
I've thought a lot about this lately too. Why can't I just be happy with me RIGHT NOW? I have a great job, a great boyfriend, a great family, I do what I love, but there is a sense of un-happiness and it drives me nuts.
I'd agree with that. You are pretty awesome.
Awesome post, we all need to do this more :)
I love this post. And I can totally relate. I don't take compliments well either and sometimes I assume people "have" to say it. Like, my husband "has" to think I am beautiful.
I think you are pretty awesome too. And beautiful. I always like reading your posts!
Thanks for sharing and for being so open about this. I can relate. And it's not easy to talk about.
Never in my life have I taken a compliment well. Still don't.
Low self esteem :) Curse and a blessing.
I once read an article about being able to take a compliment, and since then I have improved my ways!
Nowadays I say: 'Thank you! That's so nice to hear!'
Mom's Home Run
Before I read your last paragraph, I was going to say "Practice taking compliments with a simple THANK YOU", but you beat me to it and improved upon it. Yes, you are awesome.
Yes, you are awesome! I do know what you mean though :)
I think this is a fatal flaw of women, in general. We never feel like we're quite measuring up - socially or professionally. So when we do receive a compliment, we discount it because we have so many negative thoughts consuming us.
We control what we think and feel. If we re-program our noodle, receiving compliments will be expected and welcomed rather than shocking and feel as if we're not worthy. You totally are :).
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